


When Comes A Child

by Dirty_Corza



Series: Mayra Hawke [6]
Category: Dragon Age II
Genre: F/M, Fatherhood, Hurt/Comfort, Morning Sickness, Past Infidelity, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-12
Updated: 2017-02-26
Packaged: 2018-09-23 15:56:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9664391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dirty_Corza/pseuds/Dirty_Corza
Summary: After leaving Kirkwall, Mayra Hawke begins to suspect she is with child. She doesn't have the slightest idea of how to tell Anders, or what they will do once the truth is known.





	1. Discovery

“You’re sick again?” Anders’ voice was colored with concern as he walked to Hawke’s side, a hesitant hand reaching for her shoulder while the other helped steady himself against the ship’s railing.

She coughed, a hint of laughter in it as she glanced up at him, hardly turning her face away from the sea. “Every day this past week, just after noon, like clockwork. I’m starting to expect it. Something about the mid-day sea just… doesn’t agree with me.”

“Like the fact you’re on it?” Anders quipped, though the concern hadn’t quite left his voice. “Are you sure you don’t want me to-”

Mayra shook her head, reaching up to give his hand on her shoulder a tight squeeze. “No. I’m- I’m good. Just seasick. Another week of not being able to hold down my lunch? You can give me the full exam then.”

“If you say so, love.” He gave her hand a firm return squeeze, “But I will hold you to that.”

All she could do was nod in response, her stomach heaving again. She had a feeling she knew exactly what it was that gave her a post on deck every day. And now, she had another week to put it off before she had to face the reality of it. If she had been willing to tell him the truth, it was already nearly a month she’d spent noxious every day. And another week would mark two months since- Mayra coughed, letting her mind focus on her physical pain and the comforting heat of Anders’ hand. 

In the month and a half since they left Kirkwall, there had been a lot to talk about. Things Mayra couldn’t let stay coiled up inside. And for all her grief over Fenris had been overwhelming, she hadn’t been able to keep the truth about her dealings with Zevran from Anders either. There were just some suspected truths she would rather leave as an unknown, at least for another week. 

\- - -

A week later, and Mayra found herself heaving at the railing again, though the sickness was weaker now, as if her body was settling in at last. Which, a traitorous thought at the back of her mind reminded her, it was. 

By the time Anders joined her at the railing, a gentle hand stroking down her back, Mayra was done being sick. She could have returned to their cabin nearly half an hour ago. But she hadn’t. She had stayed here, gripping the railing like she wasn't able to come to grips with her life. 

Gentle hands came to her shoulders, urging her to stand, to turn, to face her companion once more. His smile was soft, as golden eyes met brown, open concern in his features. “That’s two weeks now, of daily dates with this railing.”

Mayra gave a soft laugh, pulling out a handkerchief from where she kept it tucked into her belt. “I guess this means I have to keep that appointment with the healer, then?” She wiped at her lips and chin, wishing for a swig of ale to take the bitter taste from her mouth. 

His smile faded as he reached out to gently caress her cheek. “Mayra, is there a reason you don’t want me to examine you? I want to help you, love.”

With a deep breath she looked up at him, meeting his eye as she covered his hand with hers, pressing his calloused fingers into her skin. “I- can we go back to the cabin for this?”

“Of course.” Anders gave a nod, pulling his hand back only to find Mayra holding tight to his side, letting him support her as they made their way below deck.

She only let go of him once they reached their room, standing just far enough away they weren’t touching anymore.

“Should I do the magic first, or do you want to tell me?” he asked, reaching to take her hand again, gently stroking down the red lines that now decorated dark skin.

“I-” Mayra swallowed tightly, her eyes focused where he was holding her, that gentle reminder of all they had come through, everything he had supported her through. “I think I’m-” she couldn’t say the word, as if saying it would make her fear more real, as if saying it meant it would be true. Instead, she reached for one of his hands, grasping it tightly while she took the other and moved it to rest low on her stomach. She let her eyes raise at that, watching his face as understanding fell over him.

“Oh Mayra,” his voice was soft, a near reverent whisper as he stepped closer, slowly letting his magic ease into her. “You were afraid to tell me?”

Her laugh was breathless as he pulled her close, letting go of her hand so he could wrap his arm around her shoulder as he let his magic work. “We were always careful, so I-I knew…”

The soft press of his lips to her temple was a surprise, as was the feeling of dampness on his cheek when he pressed his face to hers. “You’re pregnant, Mayra. And regardless of whose bed they were conceived in, I promise I will protect them as long as you will let me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, a big thank you to Barbex for reading over this for me and helping me clean it up. <3
> 
> Second of all: thank you to the Weird Shit crew for encouraging me in my writing. I wouldn't have dared attempt it without you. <3


	2. Waking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Justice helps.

Mayra wasn’t asleep when Justice woke. She was watching the early morning dawn coming over the sea from the little balcony their small room had come with, leaning heavily on the rail.

“You Cannot Sleep.”

She glanced over her shoulder at the familiar rumble, much deeper than Anders’ voice, a small smile on her lips at the faint blue glow in the room behind her. “Neither can you, it would seem.”

His answering grumble only made her smile widen. Their spirit was so predictable. “You Should Be In Bed.”

She gave a shrug, turning back to the sunrise as she waited for him to join her. “It’s hard to sleep sometimes.”

“With Anders There?” There was no accusation in his tone, no approval or condemnation behind the words, and yet they still made Mayra flinch.

“Justice-” Her words fell short as he covered her hand with his.

“There Is No Shame In Honesty.”

“I don’t want to hurt him again. You know that.”

He answered with a hum, stepping closer until they were pressed tightly against each other. “I Do. And Anders Knows This As Well.”

She leaned against him, relaxing against the solid presence that was Justice. “It’s hard to sleep with Anders there,” she paused, shaking her head slightly. “No. It’s hard to wake up with Anders there. Some days I forget, while I’m asleep. And I wake up in his arms, and then… I remember.”

“You Do Not Like To Remember?”

Her answering laugh was dull, even to her own ears. “No. I don’t like to remember. Not all at once. What I did, what it caused. The fact Anders wants to be a father so badly, even if he’s careful not to say it.”

“Having A Child Only For Him Would Be-”

Mayra’s laugh had a bit more life in it that time as she gave him a firm hip bump. “Unjust. You’ve said it before, Justice.”

“Being Reminded You Chose This Makes You Happy Again.”

She sighed, pulling her hand away from his so she could sling her arm around his waist with an ease of familiarity she had lost with Anders. “It does. Because it reminds me of the whys, more than just the hows.”

\- - -

Mayra wasn’t asleep when Anders woke. He wasn’t sure how he could tell, with her cradled in his arms, their hands entwined where they rested over the prominent bump of her stomach. Maybe it was something in her breathing, in the way she leaned back against him as he stirred.

“Good morning,” she murmured, hands squeezing his in greeting.

“Mmm, morning,” he said in reply, turning to press a kiss to her neck out of habit before he paused, waking up enough to realize how long it had been since she been in his arms when he woke, since she had let him give her such easy affection. He gave a pleased hum at the realization, pulling her more tightly to him, pressing his lips much more firmly against her skin.

She laughed, a small sound, but one he had missed hearing like this. “Enjoying yourself?”

“Very much so.”

“I’m glad.” There was something in the way Mayra spoke that had Anders nearly speaking up, asking her what had happened between last night and this morning to lead to this. 

However, when she took his hand tightly in hers, as if she couldn’t bear to let him go, he found the words fading away. Later, they would talk again. But for now, he could accept it, this gift of a restful moment without the past -or the future- hanging over their heads.


	3. Musings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders notices some of the changes in Mayra since leaving Kirkwall.

Mayra was exhausted. Anders could see it in the way she groaned in the morning, pushing herself to get out of bed, in the way her fingers shook when she tried to help him make their meals. 

But for all the signs that she needed to sit, to rest, to take a moment for herself, there was something else Anders saw as well.

Mayra was happy.

Her morning groans were paired with tired smiles, with her rolling her eyes at him when he teasingly asked her to stay. “You’d tire of me sitting around the house, bemoaning my swollen feet and aching sides,” she’d tease back, reaching for his hand so she could give it a squeeze that said she knew it wasn’t true.

In the evenings, when they made dinner together, her shaking hands came with laughter. Not every night, but more often than not she took pride in being so weary. “It’s a sign I’ve done something today,” she had said once when he asked. “That my hands can do more than- than hold daggers. If I can make a stitch that holds, I might not be as hopeless as all that with... our child.”

That was something else that had changed in the months since they’d come to this Nevarran town. They weren't simply Mayra, Anders, Justice and the child. He knew it had something to do with Justice, knew the spirit was the one who woke at night when Mayra couldn't sleep. There was a time he might have been jealous of it, the way Mayra was so at ease afterwards, the way she never showed signs of holding herself back from the spirit like she had with him. 

But then he would remember her smile the mornings after, the way she’d let him coddle her when she got home from work, the way it had been one such talk with Justice that had her agreeing to let him see if there was a clinic he could do work for in town. He knew that three years ago, six, he might have been hurt by the fact Justice had a place with her that he didn’t. Now, though, there was just a warm feeling at the back of his mind. Something between approval and desire that made itself known whenever he saw one of the little signs that Mayra had been spending more time with Justice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge shout out and thank you to Pike and the rest of the Weird Shit crew for encouraging me to continue on this. <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anders and Justice, and the first times they hold their daughter.

"She's beautiful." There was awe in Anders' voice, adoration, love.

Mayra gave a little nod, smiling down at the little girl who was finally in her arms, freshly cleaned. "She is. Little Derora."

Anders sat on the edge of the bed beside her, reaching to brush the sweat-soaked bangs out of Mayra's face. "Just like her mother."

That earned him a tired little laugh, and Mayra's smile aimed at him. "Would you like to hold her?"

"I- I already-"

"As her father, not her healer."

Mayra's clarification made Anders' protest fall flat, something in the back of his mind quivering with "Good. Proper. Right." as he stared at the little girl in Mayra's arms, her tawny skin starkly contrasted by her pale blond mess of hair. "I'd love to hold our little girl," he said at last, letting Mayra transfer her to his arms.

The quivering in the back of his mind settled into a contented hum as he cradled her to his chest, Mayra's warm weight leaning against his side. "Your daughter," she murmured, and he couldn't help but echo the sentiment.

"My daughter." It was enough to bring tears to his eyes, gazing down on that beautiful small child. This wasn't a moment he had ever dared to imagine, not since the circle and the wardens. Even the past months, knowing the day was coming, he hadn't let himself think about this. But there was a life in his arms, small, but growing. "Derora," he whispered the name with reverence, letting the meaning echo in his mind. Freedom. A fitting name for the girl, a hope and promise of what her life would hold. A reminder of what had brought them here.

\- - -

Justice stirred slowly, not bothering to force away the sleepiness that settled over Anders' body as he rose. Mayra was already awake, sitting up in bed nursing.

"Decided you were ready to meet her?" she asked, a tired yet teasing smile on her face.

"It Seemed Unjust To Intrude Upon Anders' First Moments." He replied, his voice soft for all it still rang through the room.

"True. The moment he held her..."

"I... Have Never Felt Him So Joyful." Slowly, he moved closer to her, eyes drawn to Derora's tiny hand where it grasped at Mayra's chest while she nursed.

"She's almost done eating, if you'd like to hold her, too." Mayra spoke, her words making it sound so easy.

Justice could feel Anders' worry at the suggestion, the memories of Kirkwall bright in his mind. He himself was unsure of it. It had taken him months to get used to the restrictions Anders had, the idea of holding a new life in his hands?

"The look on your face! It's like the first time Carver was asked to hold a child during chantry service. You won't hurt her, you know."

Justice blinked in surprise, looking up to see her small smile had turned into a grin.

"Come on, sit here next to me. I'll teach you how to hold our daughter."

He couldn't find any words to say to that, meekly nodding as he moved to sit closer to Mayra's side.

"Now put your arms up, no not like-" Mayra directed him with one arm, until his hands were positioned in a way she found satisfactory. "There you go." She smiled up at him when she was done, "Now, you're ready to hold her."

"I Am Fairly Certain There Is More-" Justice's words were cut short by Mayra moving, gently setting Derora in his hands.

Derora was fussing almost immediately, face scrunched up, a tiny whine coming from her as she fidgeted.

"She Is Not Happy," He glanced at Mayra his eyes wide. "It Is Unjust."

He was met with a smile and a laugh, Mayra leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek. "You're holding her like she'll break if she comes near you. Don't be so afraid."

"I Will Try." He swallowed tightly, pulling on Anders' memories of the past few days to try and mimic what he had done. A few minutes, and she was calming in his arms, cradled close to his chest. "I-" he turned, wanting to share the moment with Mayra, only to find her asleep against his side. Instead, he turned back to Derora, bringing his face close to hers, whispering "I Have Brought Our Daughter Peace," with pride in his voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge shoutout to vonuberwald on tumblr who did some AMAZING art pieces to go with this chapter.
> 
> http://dirtycorzaharkness.tumblr.com/post/157754074281/she-is-not-happy-he-glanced-at-mayra-his-eyes


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